Minibusted
by jmolly
Summary: After Alice puts a risque engagement photo of Edward and Bella in the paper, they attempt to lie low from the gossips by taking a trip to Niagara. Little do they expect a busload of human friends to join them. UE Series #2.
1. Chapter 1

**Minibusted:**

**Chapter 1: Thwarted**

**A Sequel to "Unforeseen Events". **

**Disclaimer:**** All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original ch****aracters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is merely coincidental. ****Everything 'Twilight' belongs to Stephenie Meyer. I just love humiliating Edward. He's so cute when he squirms. **

**Friday, July 22****nd****, 2005:**

**(21 days before the wedding)**

_**Niagara Falls Ontario:**_

_**Edward's pov:**_

I was brushing my teeth when I heard _her_.

Bella and I had arrived Wednesday night, barely 36 hours after we left Seattle. She had crawled into bed, exhausted, the minute I escorted her into a suitable inn, and now, we were sort of sharing a human moment in Niagara Falls Ontario. I didn't technically have to brush my teeth, but I liked her toothpaste. So, I was standing in my towel, in the middle of the room, dripping and foaming, when I heard _her_.

Alice.

Blind white fury consumed me. Hadn't she understood that Bella and I were trying to get away from it all? Away from _her_? Without even stopping to think, I marched over to the door and tore it open. Shame I hadn't listened further out, first.

"Surprise!" came a noisy chorus from the hallway. Oh, crap.

"Alice, What the fuck?" I pinched the bridge of my nose between my fingers, wondering how I was going to stop myself from flaying my formerly-favorite sister to shreds and burning her in front of human witnesses. And I had sworn in front of humans. I never swore, except when I was with my brothers. Crap.

"Hello, darling brother!" _I had to do this, sorry, _she thought at me._ No matter what I tried, I couldn't change the vision of you coming home bereft and alone. Then Rose mentioned that you ought to have a Stag and Doe, and when I imagined bring__ing your friends up here for the weekend, all the horrors disappeared. Oh, and Lauren invited herself along, sorry. This is the only way to keep Bella safe. I __hate to wreck your getaway, honestly. "_So where have you stashed Bella?"

Alice had the audacity to push past me, and start looking around. Our friends and acquaintances and petty enemies filed in after her, toting suitcases. Emmett took one look at me and laughed his dirty laugh. _We enjoyed the pictures, stud! Are you gonna let Alice take mor__e? _Bloody Bimbo. Then came Rose, Ang, Ben, Mike, Jess, Tyler, Lauren (of all people she had to come... _Crap_!_), _Conner, Austin and Jasper. And I was wearing a towel, and my hair was dripping on the carpet, and I was still holding the toothbrush. I gaped at them, horrified.

Bella chose that moment to exit the bathroom. In a towel that did not quite cover her. Dripping wet. I closed my eyes.

Bella screamed a scream that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and danced on the spot like a cartoon female spotting a mouse. She disappeared back into the bathroom and bolted the door shut with a slam.

I glared at Alice. "Thanks_ so _much. Didn't I say we were getting out of Forks until the gossip cooled a bit? And _this_ is how you help, bringing a complete jury all the way here to have _lambs _hung for sheep?"

_I bet he's not hung like a sheep. More like a horse._ _Look at that six pack! He looks hard as a rock. Wonder what else is hard. _Jessica, naturally, was keeping neither her thoughts clean, nor her eyes up. She was picturing me _sans_ towel. She wasn't the only one. Even Angela and Ben were thinking about me and Bella in the shower. A dozen people's fantasies were way more sordid than the truth. No point protesting that we hadn't gone very far. Nobody would buy it. Taboo to tell them that the vampire fiance decided it was prudent to get out while endearingly clumsy Bella had a razor in her hands. Of course, had they arrived later, they might have had something real to dish about.

Had I been capable of blushing, I would have been bright red. The males were in seventh heaven. Rosalie was contemplating how to best initiate yet another serious chat with me. Jessica and Lauren couldn't wait to alert the grapevine. Forks hadn't had this good an earful in years.

I focused on not killing Alice. I was speechless.

"Loosen up, bluenose. This is going to be the best Stag & Doe Weekend anybody from Forks has ever seen."

I sighed and counted to 100. "Okay. I _give_. _How_ did you get everybody 2500 miles from home, and _what _is The Plan? And I am not a prude. I am just not an exhibitionist. Which _you_ should honor, if you are at all fond of me."

"Whatever," she piped brightly. "We rented a minibus, and invited everybody to take a spontaneous trip to join you. Carlisle paid everyone's way as a gift. I booked us all in here, and with less than 2 hours notice we managed to collect everyone and leave Forks. Emmett and Rose and I took turns driving, since we each have the proper license. The plan is to have a lot of group fun this weekend, and drive home Monday morning."

Group fun? Lauren and Jessica were reading a lot into that comment. I accidentally swallowed the toothpaste. Carlisle was now on my hit list. "Well, don't expect me to bunk in with the guys."

"Of course not. You have barely been away from Bella one night since January. No point in trying to separate you now. You will keep this room, Jazz and I have ours, Rose and Em have theirs, and the single girls will share, and the single guys will share. We were lucky to get five rooms here during peak times."

I turned my attention to the goggling group before me. Had Alice really just said out loud that I had been bunking with Bella for 7 months? Crap.

"Have you people eaten breakfast yet? It's only 7:30," I said acerbically. They couldn't have arrived just an hour later. There were various murmurs and head shakes in response. "_Fine_. Leave your stuff here, and we will move it later. If you would all be so _kind _as to go down to the restaurant and save us some seats, Bella and I will join you shortly." All the teenagers, and all my siblings except Alice, filed out again, Angela with an apologetic smile.

Bella came barrelling out of the bathroom, once again clad in the little black knit dress, that Alice had packed in the overnight bag four days previously, and not much else. Totally hot. She stuffed our wet clothes in a plastic hotel laundry bag and gathered and pitched the rest of our belongings in the overnight bag. She snatched my toothbrush and pushed a slightly wrinkled outfit into my arms, huffing, "Edward? Take me to Vegas. Now".

"Actually, love, I think there are a few wedding chapels here. No need to travel further."

"Oh, _come on_, you two. You wouldn't want to disappoint everyone. What will our kith and kin think if you elope now?"

"What will they think if we don't?" I demanded.

"This is going to be a terrific weekend. Give me a chance." Alice fluttered her eyelashes at Bella.

"Alice, you are _lucky_ I am not a violent person. You are _lucky_ I love you, or _you_ would be dead". Bella making threats. Delicious.

"Come on, Bella. Forgive me. This is for the best, trust me."

"You haven't exactly been looking out for our best interests lately, though, have you? You just brought some of the worst town gossips right into our bedroom. I can't _wait_ to read Jessica's blog."

"I _always_ look out for your best interests, Bella, and Jess is going to enjoy the trip so much that she will only have good things to say." Alice put forth her best 'cute' look. Bella glared at her and then looked at me beseechingly.

"Well, you've often said we should never bet against Alice", I said grudgingly. "Maybe we should make the best of this. Spend some quality time with the gang." My mouth twisted as I thought about spending nearly five days with certain individuals, whose thoughts were transparent to me.

Bella thought about it for a few seconds, then gave me a resigned nod. Abruptly, she turned on Alice again, eyes and tone sharp, "But Alice, this is the _last time_ I am going to forgive you for doing anything over-the-top. _You_ are on _probation_. And I do _not_ want to discuss any wedding plans until we have been back in Forks for 24hours. Is it understood?"

"Yes, Bella, I understand."

"Alice? You and the girls are going to have to take Bella shopping this morning."

Bella looked disgruntled.

"Yay!" Alice clapped.

"We don't have enough clothes to make it through the weekend. You will pick me up jeans, a golf shirt and a sweatshirt at the Hilfiger Outlet in town. Keep it simple, I don't want to take truckloads of clothes home. Then you will find _modest _bathing attire for Bella and me. Oh, and Alice? Stay out of the adult 'toy' stores or I swear I will kill you in front of everyone."

"Alright, Killjoy. How will you occupy the guys this morning?"

"What's the forecast like?"

"Overcast and muggy. We'd better get some raincoats, too. The falls can get quite misty."

"I will take the guys to the gym. That will be a suitable male bonding activity, will it not? We'll meet up with you girls at the pool at 11am. Then maybe hit Clifton Hill?"

"Yay! You won't regret this Edward. Come on Bella, let's go shopping! You need shoes, too."

"No shoes, Alice." Bella liked wearing Converse sneakers with dresses. It suited her.

Alice was tugging on Bella now. Bella and I exchanged a look. Resigned. A little disappointed. Rueful. Damn it. I kissed Bella goodbye, steered them both out the door, and turned to get dressed. So much for getting away from it all.


	2. Chapter 2

**Minibusted:**

**Everything belongs to its respective owners. No sue. Because I love to play in Stephenie's world.**

**Chapter 2: Clifton Hill**

**Bella's pov**

I had to admit that the day was going kind of well, despite the fact that Alice had completely scuppered my romantic scheming for Edward. You can't seduce somebody with that many witnesses around.

The minute our group of girls had left the hotel restaurant, the barrage of personal questions started. It was just as bad as I expected. _What _had Alice _meant _when she said that Edward hadn't spent a night without me since his return in January? _What _had we gotten up to last night? _Why _had I been holding out on my best friends? I mumbled and stuttered my way through answers as bland as I could invent, but I still had to admit Edward had been sneaking in my window at night for cuddles. Nobody believed that we hadn't gotten to third base, and Alice was not helping with her interjections and innuendo.

Unfortunately, I kinda lost it on her in front of Forks' two worst junior league gossips.

"Alice, for once, _just once_, shut your mouth. Because of _you_, Edward and I went to that stupid movie. Had _you_ not been driving us up the wall, we would _never _have gone, and we would never have gotten carried away. Then Charlie would _never _have caught Edward undressing me and he would _not _have tried to shoot us and we would not have had to endure positively _excruciating _conversations with _parents _while wearing practically nothing_._ And _you_ took pictures to commemorate the occasion! I _thought _you loved me. And had _you _not put that damned picture in the paper and had _Rose_ not showed it to Charlie, then Edward and I would _not _have run away from home. And had the hotel clerks in Seattle _not _asked for our autographs because that picture has made us some sort of ... _soft_ _porn _celebrities everywhere between La Push and Montana, Edward and I would _not _be here at the Falls, _caught_ by our peers and siblings while trying to break a Commandment. Edward and I would be at home _right now _ticking items off your damned annoying wedding lists!" I threw all this at Alice with arms akimbo, then blushed fiery red as I remembered where we were. Rose was snickering and Ang, Jessica and Lauren were agog. Alice was the only one not phased by my tirade.

"Well, where would the fun be in that? You've been together nearly two years, Bella, and have hardly any embarrassingly human moments to remember in your old age. You should thank me for livening things up for you. You were becoming positively boring to watch. Maybe now he'll let things heat up."

"Alice, things _were _heating up!" I whined. "Then _you_ showed up with a _busload _of friends. I will be lucky if Edward spends _five minutes_ alone with me between now and the wedding. You know how old-fashioned he is." Belatedly, I remembered that Jessica, Lauren and Ang were present, heads swinging back and forth between myself and Alice like they were following a tennis match. I waggled my finger at them, "And if _any _of you repeat _any _of that to anybody, then _I _am going to get Charlie's gun and personally come after you!"

"It's probably just as well we're here, Bella. Edward would have ended up breaking more than one Commandment if we had left you two alone too much." Alice eyed me darkly. Oh. I blanched. So that's why she engineered this.

"Well, um, everything happens for a reason, right? Are we going to go and have some fun? Where are we shopping?" Angela, my best human friend, looked completely nonplussed by my abrupt about face. _Edward _breaking Commandments? _Me_ enthusing about shopping? Both concepts were totally alien to her knowledge of us.

The females fell into the minibus and the conversation passed onto more amenable subjects. Rosalie drove up to a plaza on Lundy's Lane where they sold designer clothes at warehouse prices and hustled us out of the bus. Alice, on cloud nine, helped me pick out nice, midnight blue Tommy Hilfiger jeans for Edward and me, and a pale blue golf shirt for him and a blue button-down t-shirt for me, and the girls teased me into getting myself and Edward matching red, white and blue polar fleece hoodies. I quietly slipped underwear and socks into the basket. Like I would _ever _normally pay $90 for ordinary looking underwear, but necessity dictated the purchase. Besides, Edward's credit card limit was astronomical. I couldn't go around with this lot dressed like Paris. Then, I thought I'd better get some underwear for Edward, too. I hoped nobody noticed me in the guys' section of the store. Jess and Lauren would have a field day with that. I ducked in and out of the aisle as quickly as possible.

Alice found navy blue windbreakers at another store, and bought enough to supply one to all 14 people in our group. Great. Now we _all_ matched. At least it should be easy to keep track of everybody.

In a tacky gift shop, we found bathing suits. Rosalie gave the human girls pointers on buying bikinis that would fit well and be flattering, and told them how to keep them from riding up. I picked a blue one-piece and demanded to see the suit Alice had chosen for Edward. It was a black thong. I put it back and chose a soft, green pair of shorts for him over her protests. Then, when she wasn't looking, I tucked the thong back into my pile of purchases. What Alice didn't know wouldn't hurt us.

After using Edward's credit card, I rejoined the group and all of us traipsed back to the minibus, purchases in hand. Rosalie handed me a little bag, saying it was for me. In it, I discovered a miniscule red thong bikini. She smiled softly at me and got behind the wheel. Holy. Cow. Rosalie bought me a present? Guess she didn't hate me anymore.

Edward was waiting for his new clothing when I got to the room. He raised one eyebrow at the thong, but said nothing. We changed into the polite swimwear and went down to meet our group at the pool. Soon, the girls were dangling tired feet in the cool water, and the boys were roughhousing with each other to impress us. My future family did not join in.

Edward came to tread water peacefully beside me, whispering amusing anecdotes about weight lifting with humans that were only audible to me. Jasper took his guitar, and now sat quietly against the end wall, picking out notes and humming quietly to himself. After she spent a few minutes in the water, Alice went to sit with him. Rose and Emmett lounged on the deck furniture, pretending to drowse.

I joined Edward in the water, and we swam a few lazy laps. We continued to whisper about the perils of having human friends around us, privy to our every move, and then Edward teasingly goosed me on the backside. His hand was freezing! I yelped in surprise and went under and he had to haul me up, spluttering. Naturally, everyone noticed.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen!" Alice frowned theatrically as she bellowed across the pool, "Did you just cop a feel? I am going to tell Esme on you." Rosalie and Emmett rolled with glee. The humans snickered. Jasper smirked and went back to picking his guitar.

"Alice? Be careful how you threaten me. I still owe you for the other day, and I have thought of a few things I could tell Esme about you, too."

After that, Jessica and Mike announced that they had a little gift for us. Much to our chagrin, they forced us to don black baseball caps. Edward's had a little white tuxedo shirt sewn into the front, complete with tie, and it said 'groomzilla' on the back. Mine had a little white veil on top, and a little white dress on the front, and it said 'bridezilla' on the back. We were told that we would be expected to wear them everywhere for the duration of the trip. Well, it could have been a lot worse.

After 45 minutes, Edward ordered us out of the pool. By noon, we were all assembled in the parking lot, hats and all. Alice announced that we had lunch reservations, and that all group meals and activity tickets for the trip were to be covered by Carlisle. Our friends were thrilled.

Since it was only about a mile's walk to Clifton Hill, we decided to leave the minibus behind. We lunched at a place called the Rainforest Cafe, where bellowing animatronic gorillas and elephants and booming fake thunderstorms interrupted patron conversations ever few minutes. I thought it was awesome but my vampires said it wasn't nearly as good as the real thing.

After lunch, we hit Dracula's Castle, but something leapt out at us and Emmett attacked it. He roared and pushed it back so hard that he busted the hydraulic gear and we could hear it groaning. We made a fast getaway. We rampaged through video arcades and fun houses on the Hill. Everybody went on a laser-gun-shooting, interactive ghost ride. Emmett and Jasper kept directing the laser guns at Edward's zipper. We cashed in game tokens for prizes (Emmett got the biggest prize on offer, a big stuffed bear, for Rosalie). We ate ice cream, bought maple fudge and souvenirs, took pictures and razzed each other the whole time.

We had dinner reservations at an old fashioned place called the Beef Baron, way up at the top of the Hill. It had dark-wooden, circular booths with red leather seats that could comfortably fit 8 people. The non-vegetarians had prime rib dinners and the vegetarian vampires pretended to eat pasta. I wondered where they hid the food. Edward was going to have to teach me that, once I was changed. Dinner was rounded off with a selection of rich tortes and the best coffee I had ever tasted.

We rolled our overstuffed bellies out of the restaurant after dark, and took in the bright lights on the Hill. Then we took a ride on the observation wheel. Our group started to board one car. An instant before the door could shut, Edward lifted me off so fast I didn't know where we were. We were in the next car. We got to ride by ourselves, while the rest of our group was crammed in together. Alice shook her finger at us from the opposing car, but was distracted when Jasper scootched up behind her and bit her on the neck. Edward and I took advantage of the alone time. More teasing ensued when the ride was over.

When Jess suggested we stop somewhere for a drink, Emmett led us to an upstairs patio offering karaoke, pizza and beer.

Mike and his friends were delighted to discover that we were of legal drinking age, and most of our humans queued up to the bar. The beer flowed freely, and my future siblings were draining bottles as fast as any human. Edward nursed his, not playing along. I, like Angela, stuck with soda.

Before we knew it, we were all laughing and cheering as various members of the group went up for karaoke. Emmett was first, crooning Marvin Gaye's "_Sexual Healing_" to Rose while gyrating in an obscene manner. Mike took a turn with "_I'm too Sexy_", which Jessica and Lauren followed up with Avril Lavigne's "_Girlfriend"_. The group cajoled me unsuccessfully. I would rather be tortured by Jane than go up there. I waved Ang and Ben up, and they did a lousy but enthusiastic job of the old classic, "_Kung Fu Fighting"._ Jasper covered a James Taylor song I'd never heard of but Edward seemed to like. Then somebody noticed that Edward had not been dragged up there.

Edward rolled his eyes and allowed himself to be bullied up. It took him several minutes to choose a song from the catalogue. I guess he couldn't find anything from the 50's. Then, he approached the microphone and dedicated the song to me. It was "_Unchained Melody"_ by the Righteous Brothers, and it was perfect. The people on the patio paired up to dance. I felt my eyes well up as he finished. I was such a sentimental slob. Angela nudged me and whispered, "That boy is too good to be true. He really loves you. I wish Ben were that romantic. Of course, nobody really wants to hear Ben sing_._"

When asked for an encore, Edward followed up with the bluesy David Bowie version of "_Wild is the Wind_". He crooned. He snarled. He cried. And the whole time, his eyes smouldered into mine. When he hit the last high note, I could restrain myself no longer. I ran right up on the platform and threw myself into his arms. He crushed me to his chest and swung me off my feet. After kissing me soundly, he deposited me back at our section of tables, where our friends delivered a series of compliments and toasts to our future.

"Like, wow... that was really hot!" Jess enthused, "Are you going into music?"

"No, I don't like the public attention." Edward pretended to sip his beer.

"Why didn't you take music at school?" Mike wondered.

"Well, I did take it in Alaska, but the guys at school there made fun of me, so I decided not to take it when we moved to Forks."

"Nobody's making fun of you now, man. You are really good." Tyler stated.

"Thanks, but I only sing for people I know."

Nobody seemed to want to follow Edward's performance, so everyone danced to recorded music after that. Edward picked me up and simply carried me onto the dance floor. There was no denying him.

Emmett requested a lot of well-known dances, like _Thriller_, the _Macarena,_ the _Cha Cha Slide_, and _Soulja Boy_. My vampires knew all the moves. They _Chicken Dance_d with exuberance and they _Mony Mony_ed with all the naughty response words added in. They did their best to help the humans learn the steps. Edward also dazzled me into trying a couple of salsa dances. I probably would have done better had I imbibed a couple of beers. Still, my senses were full of Edward and my feet followed him without any severe difficulty.

Finally, the bar closed and after a last slow dance (to which the vampires foxtrotted), our group walked contentedly, if somewhat unsteadily, back to the hotel. It seemed a lot farther to walk on the way back. Of course, Edward had pulled me up for almost every dance, so I was tired. When Edward noticed I was having a hard time keeping up, he hoisted me up on his back and carried me.

Mike must have found his courage at the bottom of a beer glass because he asked Edward a much-too-personal question about our plans for the night. Edward turned frosty eyes on him, and Emmett, who was pretending to be drunk, threw an arm around Mike and told him he'd better watch what he asked if he wanted to live long enough to get back to the hotel. Mike paled a little, but recovered when Em punched his shoulder gently and chuckled. Emmett then instigated a much too loud sing-along of lewd songs, which Edward tried to quash because we were walking past people's houses.

In the lobby, we all bade each other goodnight and headed to our respective rooms, but not before several people gave me and Edward rather suggestive winks. We were under-impressed.

I kicked off my shoes as soon as Edward had the door open, flopped down spread-eagled, and moaned into the comforter. The next thing I knew, it was morning.


	3. Chapter 3

**Minibusted**

**Caution: This chapter is rated M for Lemons. **

**All Stephenie's crew, not mine. No sue. Because I love the Cullens and their friends and I don't like their petty enemies. All songs belong to their respective owners.**

**Chapter 3: Practice, Edward!**

**Rated M for sexuality. Lemons.**

**Edward's pov**

Bella moaned softly as I kissed her awake. Her arms reached out to draw me closer, and she breathed me in. The thirst flared in my throat momentarily, then dulled. I was not hungry. At least, not for blood. I pulled her closer, drawing the infinity symbol repeatedly on her neck with my lips, and she arched. Her hands started to explore, a little lower than I was going to presently allow. I chuckled as I moved them higher, and she frowned blearily at me and I deciphered her garbled speech.

"Practice, Edward," she ordered gruffly.

I laughed gently. "Not unless you are planning to get busted again, naughty Bella. Everyone's meeting downstairs at 10:00, which gives you half an hour to get ready. If we don't show up, the curious will be up here looking for us."

"Well, we can't have that. It might ruin our reputation or something." Bella yawned as she rolled away from me and padded to the bathroom.

I flipped up the bed covers, leaned back, and unrolled the Saturday paper. The local stories were on the front page, which was rather a nice change from the big city papers. It gave a nice small-town feeling to the place.

Bella emerged wearing her new Tommy clothes, and we decided it would be prudent to empty our overnight bag and put in our sweaters and rain jackets in case we did not return to the hotel before nightfall. The previous evening had gotten a bit cool for the humans.

Just as we were ready to go downstairs, there was a rap on the door. Alice: the psychic with perfect timing. I let her in.

"Good morning, Perky," I teased, "How was your night?"

"I see you're more cheerful this morning. Must be Bella's fault. Last night was fun. Rose, Jasper and Emmett and I took turns spying on your young friends. A couple of them tried to sneak into each others' rooms. We arranged noises to wake their roommates so that they didn't get very far."

"Very chaperone-ish of you."

"I thought so. Conner, Tyler, and Lauren are very hung over this morning. They won't be wanting breakfast. It would be _bad_ to let them on the bus this morning. Jess and Mike and Austin are feeling a bit under the weather, too, but Ang and Ben are totally fine."

"Ang, being a true saint, and Ben, being deathly afraid of Reverent Mr. Weber, abstain from all manner of overindulgence, which leaves them free to delight in the wonders of the morning. They are models of propriety for us all."

"Yes, well, the ones who are _not _role models for us all are going to put a dent in our plans. What do you suggest? I haven't Seen anything because nobody has made any decisions."

I looked out at the overcast sky. "How about a walk down to the Falls? We can have brunch at Table Rock, ride the Maid of the Mist, go down the tunnels, and then head back toward the Hill. We could take the kids to Planet Hollywood, and the Hershey Store. I hear there are fireworks on Saturday nights as well. Perhaps we could attend?"

"It will be delightful. Morning, Bella."

"Yuh, mng-you-too." Bella stomped in and threw herself down on the bed. She reached for her shoes.

"I see you're still tired. Up late?"

"Go-da-hell...Stup'd cheerful t-r guide." Bella was trying unsuccessfully to get her shoes tied. I knelt in front of her and did it for her. "Fanks."

"You're welcome cutie pie. Now come on or we're going to be invaded again." I took her hand and led the way out.

In the lobby, our group was assembled in various states of disarray. I guess none of them were used to staying up so late. Lauren and Conner opted to stay behind and nurse their heads. They would meet us later, at the Hard Rock, they avowed. I wished I didn't know what they were planning for the afternoon. Yuck.

It was a lovely walk, and the flower gardens were outstanding. Our group looked very cohesive in the jackets. Great for photos in the walled garden. We asked an older gent to take pictures for us, so we could _all_ be in a few. He was very friendly, and asked where we came from and how we were connected. He thought perhaps we were some kind of team, all with the same jackets. "Yes," replied Bella, "We're Team Edward," and she kissed my cheek softly. Everyone laughed while I disabused him of this notion.

We enjoyed taking more photos in front of the American and Horseshoe Falls. Bella and I posed in our silly hats, and Emmett threatened to throw himself over the railing. Rose dragged him off by his ear, cussing him out, much to the amusement of our group.

We enjoyed our brunch and shopping, and went on some tours, and took photos with the Mountie. Then, we took a carriage ride that went all the way to Victoria Park and back to the foot of the Hill. We went to Planet Hollywood and saw the movie memorabilia, and our humans were indeed delighted with the Hershey chocolate desserts. We stopped by the Hard Rock to grab Lauren and Conner, who were revoltingly smarmy with each other, and read the stars names outside on the Walk of Fame. Then we meandered back down to the Falls, singing old songs as we went, and pulled up a patch of grass to wait for the fireworks.

They were excellent, although I spent more time kissing Bella than looking at them. The other committed couples in our group did not delay in copying us.

It left the singles out. Lauren, who was supposed to be paying attention to Conner, was instead paying attention to Mike, who was paying attention to Jessica, who was paying attention to nobody but herself. Austin was watching the fireworks and chatting with those people closest to him. Tyler was paying attention to Lauren. Crap. Teenagers! I tried to block all of their thoughts, concentrating on the sweetness of Bella.

Back in our room, it was a little awkward, knowing they were around and could show up at any time. My fiancee and I had passed a wonderful day and evening, and now we were alone and dressed in our nightclothes. Bella, of course, was the one to cross the distance first. She wanted more kisses.

"Dazzle me, Edward."

I obliged her. A lot. I let my hands wander. A little. She pulled me down on the bed. When she held her breath, I backed off. Then my hands crept back, to touch her chest under her shirt as usual. I had a system: I could look at Bella's body, without touching, or I could touch her without looking. I needed to get past that, so we could safely enjoy a wedding night.

Bella kept very still, letting me test myself and letting me decide how far to go. The cursed venom pooled and I swallowed it. I pulled her shirt up, surprised to find no bra. I decided that I would concentrate on making friends with her breasts with my eyes open. If I were to take things slow the risk of biting would be decreased. I touched her for a long time, fascinated. I used my palms and smoothed them over her. I rolled and kneaded and jiggled the flesh. I pinched her nipples. Then I lowered my head and used my tongue and lips to do it all again, careful not to put her in contact with my teeth.

Suddenly she climaxed, clinging to me and pouring out her love hotly all over me. My clothing and the bed were drenched. I watched her, amazed. She looked at me, trusting. I trembled for her, and buried my face in the pillow beside hers, and thanked God for giving her to me. My Bella. My heart. My soul.


	4. Chapter 4

**Minibusted**

**Rated M for lemons.**

**Everything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer, not to me. Sigh. No copyright infringement is intended, just admiration.**

**To understand Edward's slang, go to ****.com/slang/1910's**

**Chapter 4: Afterglow**

_**Edward's pov**_

I swaggered down to the lobby in the morning, thinking that I would take something up to Bella for breakfast. She was still sound asleep. My brothers and sisters were sitting on the brightly upholstered couches, perusing newspapers and checking out the humans checking out. I greeted them cheerfully.

Emmett stood up and gaped at me. "I don't believe it! Edward _got _some."

Jasper looked up from behind his paper. "You are in _quite _the good mood this morning, Bimbo," he smirked. Rosalie shot a knowing look at me and started to giggle. Obviously Alice had shared the blackmail photos.

Alice looked over at Jasper. "Well, he should be. He made it past second base without doing any damage. You'd better tone the incandescence down before the kids arrive, Edward. You look like the cat who ate the canary."

"Okay, _enough t_easing about my private life. We are supposed to check out in 3 hours. I am taking food up to Bella. No need for her to look everybody in the eye first thing in the morning. Please do not disturb. We'll meet you in the lobby at 11:00 to check out."

"Edward? Do you mind if we stop by the casino briefly before we head for home? If we play the slots, then Angela is going to get a good prize. I'd like to see her get some money of her own. She doesn't always get the treats that some of her friends do."

"Yes, I'd like to see that, too. She's a very good person. The best of Bella's circle. I'll see you at eleven. I left, whistling.

It took me a little while to decide what to get Bella. A little souvenir seemed in order, in addition to breakfast. I found a delicate gold hair clasp adorned with a cluster of freshwater pearls in the jewelry shop across the road, and decided a bacon, cheese and egg bagel and juice would probably be well received. Bella hadn't eaten fast food in some time, having been lectured repeatedly by Alice about spare tires being incompatible with designer wedding dresses.

By the time I got upstairs, Bella was awake. She smiled the smile that was only for me up from the pillow. "I thought you'd loved me and left me."

"Who, _me_? I am Mr. Long Term Commitment". I kissed her briefly and held out the paper takeout bag. She took it gratefully and dug in.

"You always know how to make the morning perfect," Bella sighed. I closed my hand around the hair clasp and held both fists out to her. Bella eyed me inquisitively.

"Choose". She picked the right hand. "Nope." I started to withdraw the left hand to put it in my pocket. Bella wasn't having that. She grinned and grabbed my arm with both of hers and tried to keep me from taking my hand back. It was pitiful. "Uh-uh, you picked wrong. If you want your token of my affection now, you will have to pay me a forfeit." Her scent changed as she turned on.

"Aw, I thought maybe it was more food. You shouldn't buy me gifts, Edward. You are everything I want. I don't need more than that."

I waited, smirking. I could almost see the wheels spinning in her head. On one hand, Bella really didn't like it when I gave her presents. On the other hand, she could probably get something _she_ wanted from _me_ by 'paying' me a forfeit. And she'd be secretly dying to know what I got her. And she wouldn't want to hurt my feelings.

"If I claim the gift, what forfeit will you ask for?" Bella asked nonchalantly. Her heart thudded erratically.

"Oh, I don't know. Why don't you tell me what you are willing to pay?" I flirted with her from under my eyelashes. "Breathe, Bella." She drew in an unsteady breath. She gave me an appraising look, then dropped her eyes as though she had decided against saying what she wanted to say.

"Tell me what forfeit you want to give me, love," I coaxed.

"No, I don't think you'll... accept it."

I raised my eyebrows. "It is ... important to you, isn't it, and you're sure I will say no. Maybe we can compromise. It's worked before."

Bella peeked at me from under the curtain of her hair, then started talking to her hands as she twisted them. I took them and smoothed them out, and she kept her focus on them as she spoke. "Well, uh..." she turned the most delicious red, "There is something that I've been thinking all morning about wanting to try, but I think it would be too easy to go too far, and Alice said we shouldn't break a Commandment or you might break more than one." She blinked nervously.

"So perhaps you could... scale your idea down a bit?"

"Well, uh, I was um, thinking that I would really like to have ... a bath with you."

It was my turn to look down. "I don't think I'm ready to have full body contact with you in water, love. It's not that I don't want to, but my instincts are already difficult to control. You smell so good wet. It's easier to touch you and look at you a bit at a time. We could shower."

"What if we wore bathing suits?"

"Mmm, better. Okay, I am going to make a suggestion. If you think you can stick to the rules then we can try it. It was very helpful when you held so still last night. If you get carried away it is going to be very difficult for me to control my strength." I explained what I had in mind. Bella said she thought she could handle it, so I snagged the thong and went in to run a bath.

I was soaking in the steaming water when Bella rapped softly on the door. I shut my eyes and told her it was okay to come in. I heard her pad softly to the side of the tub.

"Be careful, the water might be a little hot for you yet. I thought since my body temperature would cool it down quickly, that I should start it out as hot as possible." I waited, but Bella did not step into the tub.

Suddenly, Bella was touching my hair, gently pouring water on me out of a plastic cup. I stiffened, pressed hard against the back of the tub. I eyed her warily. She was wrapped in a towel, kneeling on the mat beside me.

"Ssh, it's okay. Let me take care of you for a change." Bella picked up shampoo and lathered up my head. It was wonderfully relaxing. I let the tightness go out of my muscles one by one, and surrendered to her ministrations. Hot water trickled down my back as she rinsed out the shampoo, and the last of my tension went with it.

"You need a shave." Bella scraped her nails along my jaw.

"I thought I'd take a breather from it for the weekend. Most guys don't bother shaving when they're on vacation. Do you mind it?"

"No, I like it. For a long time, I wasn't sure you even needed to shave. You used to bathe and shave so often. Your OCD is so much better. It's kind of sexy, the stubble."

"Our cells do regenerate, you know. If I cut my hair, it does grow back. It would be terrible if it didn't. We'd all be terrified to damage it."

"Lean forward."

"Yes, ma'am." She took soap and began to rub it on my back in lazy circles. I sighed and shut my eyes. It was nice to be taken care of for a change.

"You feel so warm," she marvelled.

It had been so many years since I had allowed anyone to touch me. Until Bella came into my life, I had not _wanted_ to be touched by anyone. Since she had come along, there was little else I thought about, but I had not dared to put fantasies into reality. I was too afraid that I would accidentally hurt her. It was Bella who dared to act. It was Bella who was fearless.

"Lean back."

I obeyed, careful to move slowly, and rested my arms on the sides of the tub. I opened my eyes to look at her, and groaned.

Bella had dropped the towel. Nothing but her hair and bikini thong hid her from me. And they weren't hiding much. I goggled at her like an idiot. I _knew_ I was staring like an idiot, and I couldn't so much as close my mouth. I was instantly hard. I was too turned on to be embarrassed. Bella ignored my reaction and started soaping my chest.

Bella's fingers played up and down my chest, my arms...my abdomen. Her heat radiated onto my skin. As she leaned forward, I had tantalizing glimpses of her pert breasts. The ends of her hair got wet, sliding over me and tickling. She got closer and closer to the band of my suit, then she moved her hands to my thighs, soaping and rubbing. Bella was teasing then, creeping her fingers up my legs to touch my inner thighs. I backed up a bit, nervous as to how far she would try to progress. I desperately wanted her to touch me, but every time she tried I felt like biting.

"You okay?" she murmured.

I nodded a little to let her know it was okay. She slid her hot hands up my legs until they were resting under my butt, with her thumbs pinching down against the V of my groin. She kneaded the muscles between her fingers. She brushed my anus softly as her fingers explored. I gasped. She stroked my balls, and massaged them gently. I moaned.

Instantly, Bella placed her warm hand on me with only the thin suit between us. She explored my hard length through the material. She stroked and rubbed and squeezed until I shook. I lost track of time for several of her quick, throbbing heartbeats, and then I was again lost in her eyes.

Bella did not hesitate. She slipped her fingers into my suit and touched me. _Really_ touched me. Then she took her hand back and started rubbing her chest. In a daze, I realized that she was rubbing my ejaculate onto her breasts. I couldn't believe it. I was goggling like a sappy date _again_.

Bella looked at me tenderly. "Now, you have physically marked me as yours. I belong to you." She kissed my eyes lightly shut. Her scent and mine intertwined. Such a rush. My scent was more powerfully present on her than I had ever experienced it. I sat silently, overwhelmed. How had I ever done anything good enough to deserve Bella? To deserve this? And yet, Bella thought I deserved this. Bella didn't think I was a monster. Bella thought I was a man. Decades of distress evaporated and I floated euphorically.

"You are more than I deserve. You make me so happy."

"I think you have that backwards, Edward." I felt her climb gingerly between my knees and lower herself to rest her bare back against my chest. I felt the roughness of a towel brush my arms as she spread it over us. Bella rested her hands and arms on my legs. Bella's pulse thrummed while she waited for me to respond. I wasn't ready. I didn't move or open my eyes for several minutes. She smelled so good wet.

At last, I nuzzled my face into her hair, and she lay her head down against my shoulder, relaxing. Soon, she was very still and calm. She passed me shampoo. I wet her head and then lathered her up, taking an extra long time to massage her scalp and untangle the curling tresses. I scooped water into the cup and carefully washed out all the suds. Her long hair fanned out over my chest. It felt amazing. Then, Bella passed me a bar of soap.

Gently, I took it and moved my hands back under the towel. I caressed her and let my hands slither over her skin, diverting my path whenever I hit the strings of her thong. She hummed quietly, completely relaxed. I pushed her to sit up, and then I started washing her back. My eyes followed my hands as they trailed up and down her gleaming skin. She turned her head and rested it on her knees, peeking at me from under her lashes. After I rinsed off the soap, she leaned back again, carefully repositioned the towel, and sighed contentedly.

I slipped my hands carefully back under the towel, and started playing with her breasts. Her hands caressed my legs as I gave her what she wanted. I played with her for a long time, until she shuddered and cried out my name and fell back against me. Bliss.

"Well, now we are going to smell really good. Unfortunately, my siblings will know something of how we've been spending the morning," I chuckled softly into her ear. She smiled up at me and pulled my head down for a kiss.

"Like we've _ever_ been able to get anything past Alice anyhow. I might as well get used to the fact that there are no secrets in the family. Jasper isn't going to eat me, is he?"

"Jasper learned his lesson the last time. I'm amazed he's showing such control: 2500 miles shut up in a bus with a bunch of sweaty humans." I shook my head, smiling ruefully.

"He has been looking rather strained. Maybe he should ride home in the Vanquish with us."

"It would mean having Titch, too. He doesn't like being separated from her. It's the only reason he tagged along."

"Well, this has been such a great trip, that I am considering forgiving Alice for everything."

"She'll be delighted to hear it. We should get out soon and get ready to go. Time is moving on."

"Just a few more minutes, okay?"

"Yeah."

"Edward?"

"M hmm?"

"Do I get my present now?"

"When you're dry and dressed, you minx." I squeezed her and kissed her ear.

"Minx?"

"I always seem to be thinking of you as my minx. Does that bother you?" I fretted.

"No. I like it. I wonder what my present could be... Niagara Falls nail clippers, maybe."

"Not even close," I smiled against her neck. "Come on, love. If we stay in here much longer, the kids will all be pouring into our room again, and Jess and Lauren will give Mrs Stanley enough Intel to feed her grapevine for years."

"Alright. Edward?"

"Yes, Bella?"

"Thanks."

"I should be the one thanking you. I'm putting this on my Best Morning Ever list."

"I love you."

"I love you, too, Bella."

"Shut your eyes, I'm going to get out."

Our scent wafted over me as she stood up. Bliss.


	5. Chapter 5

**Minibusted**

**All Twilight belongs to the great Stephenie Meyer. This story is a token of my admiration. Because we love the Cullens. All songs belong to their respective owners. Please no sue.**

**Rated M for innuendo.**

**With a tip of the hat to Eowyn 77 for jokes about sausages.**

**Chapter 5: Gambling**

**Alice's pov**

I exchanged a private look with Jazz as we sat in the lobby waiting for the last members of our group to arrive. I shot a wave of affection and fulfilment at him, and he smiled conspiratorially at me. I had whisked him back up to the room briefly this morning after foreseeing what Bella had planned for Edward. And I thought the previous night was good. Jazz had enjoyed my report. Poor Edward. So innocent. He really got steamrolled. Hurray for Bella.

Jazz, naturally, had to be informed. Not giving him advance warning would have been quite unfair, seeing as how shockingly loud the emotions emanating off my brother and his mate were going to be today, and how unlikely Jazz was going to be able to avoid being in close proximity to them. I had Seen that Bella and her mate were going to invite us to ride home in the Vanquish with them. It would expose Jazz to everything they were feeling, and although Jazz was happy for them, he would not like surprises.

I also told Em and Rose that they had better be nice and not tease Edward and Bella in front of the humans. I did not specify why. I thought they could figure that out on their own. There was only a 52 percent probability that they would _not_ tease the lovebirds anyway, so there wasn't much use in me filling them in. It would only give them ammunition.

By 10:45 am, our party was pretty much assembled in the lobby, barring Edward and Bella, and Rose was attempting to organize the luggage and commandeer the males into cramming it all into the minibus. Good thing it had a roof rack, because all the accumulated souvenirs were not going to fit inside the bus.

I hid behind the Japanese newspaper I was holding, while surreptitiously studying the humans. Ben and Angela were sitting with arms around each other on a couch, looking pleased, alert and relaxed. Nice. Jessica was talking to Mike with genuine interest this morning. Lauren was all cuddled up to Tyler, and Conner was looking daggers at them. Oh, _swell_. Why did that girl always have to be on the make? Guess I should have paid a bit less attention to Jasper and a little more to chaperone duty. That Lauren was a floozy. Tyler should have known better, but he always seemed to be thinking with the wrong head. Silly humans.

The elevator opened and my brother and his personal miracle worker skipped out. Literally _bounced_ out, he with their miniscule amount of luggage in hand, she with a very pretty, delicate gold barrette in her hair. She was wearing a dark blue tank top with her jeans, and by the look of it she did not have anything on underneath. Totally wrapped up in each other. Radiant. Jazz recoiled despite being forewarned.

As soon as Edward and Bella got close, greeting friends and wishing them a good morning, Rose and Emmett moved in, sniffing warily. I sat back for the show. They looked at each other and they looked at Bella and Edward and they looked at me. I smiled smugly at them. Emmett's eyebrows were on the ceiling. Then everything seemed to click for him and he moved to stand between Edward and Bella, and put his arms around them.

"Well good morning little brother, little sister. Aren't you smelling _lovely_ today. Is that a new perfume, Bella?" Emmett leered at Bella. Rose was doing her best not to laugh. After all, Edward had been subject to her picturesque thoughts for decades, and he had never ratted her out to anybody. Meanwhile, Bella was turning so red she was almost fluorescent. It was Edward who answered the question.

"Of course she has a new scent, Em. You didn't think I would bring her all the way here without giving her anything, did you?" Emmett gaped at Edward. Edward smiled smugly and inserted himself back between Emmett and Bella. An unflappable Edward: something outside Emmett's experience. Today was going to be fun. At least for Edward.

"Alright, everyone." Edward smiled, "Alice suggested that we make a quick stop at the Casino before we leave. Then we should grab a quick lunch before heading out. It's going to be a long trip, but we'll try to stop every few hours to stretch our legs."

Rose finally harangued the guys into taking all the luggage carts out to the minibus, girls trailing behind, and Edward came to talk to Jasper.

"Jazz, I know there are pros and cons either way, but Bella and I wondered whether you and Alice would like to ride with us on the way home. It would give you some space from the humans. What do you think?"

"As long as you and Bella can keep it toned down, I would be much obliged. It's getting pretty wearing, being so close to humans, and it's over a week now since we hunted."

"Okay, you and I could easily sneak out for a quick bite if you aren't with the group. Let's get your stuff in the Vanquish. Alice, what all the _heck _did you buy? The trunk is going to overflow!"

"Oh, you know, there are a lot of good designers in Niagara On the Lake. I just took a little side trip the evening before last. You should _see_ the handbags I got. Hand-tooled leather. Absolutely gorgeous."

Edward rolled his eyes and kissed me on top of the head. Then he dragged Jasper and my luggage cart off to the Vanquish. I looked at Bella and crossed my arms.

"Who are you, and what have you done to my brother?" I teased.

"Why does it have to be my fault? Why not ask him who _he_ is, and what _he_'s done to _me_?"

"Well," I looked at her slyly, "Because I know who started it, and I know who was in charge." Bella gasped and curled in on herself and giggled behind her hands. I put my arm around her and steered her out to the parking lot.

"Thank you, Bella, sincerely. He is going to be so much easier to live with from now on. Much more angst and Jazz and I would have been forced to move out."

"Well, Edward seems a little worried that the present emotional climate will not be ... comfortable for Jasper. What if angst isn't the worst thing to put up with?"

"Trust me, no matter what you two do in the future, it _couldn't_ be as bad as Emmett and Rosalie." I wrinkled my nose in disgust. Bella gave a single, soft laugh and then we joined the group.

A few minutes later, our vehicle pulled into the Casino. Rose was ahead of us, arguing with a parking attendant about how to park the minibus. I think she scared him, because she got her way.

Jasper caught one taste of the high emotions leaking out of the Casino and excused himself, ostensibly to take a nap in the car.

Emmett collected the human herd and told them to be back at the bus in 45 minutes and to be sure to eat and use the facilities at the food court before boarding the bus. He warned them to be prudent. He told them that our family had a pact to never spend more than $20 per person on gambling, and advised them to do likewise. Everybody filed in, chattering and pointing at games they wanted to try, and soon they had dispersed.

Ang and Ben remained standing in the lobby, looking a little lost. I went over and tucked myself under her arm. She was twice as tall as me.

"Come on guys, let's have a bit of fun," I coaxed.

"I don't know, Alice. It's the Sabbath, and my father doesn't think very highly of gambling."

"Well, it isn't every day that you travel 2500 miles to Canada to see the sights. Why don't you just try one quarter in a slot machine, and then you can say that you tried it without getting carried away. If you win anything on one try, it will really be a miracle. People hardly ever win on one try."

"Well, I suppose we could try just one quarter, just to say we saw what it was like to play. But don't tell my dad that we did it on Sunday."

"That's the spirit. Why don't you try this machine here?" I showed her how to play one line of the Double Diamond game. Angela approached the slot machine and dropped in a quarter. She pulled the lever, and bells and whistles went off. She and Ben looked at each other, dumbfounded. She had five Double Diamond symbols lined up in a row, and the credit counter was spinning fast. Edward and Bella ran over before the machine had stopped clanging. Angela and Ben were watching it spew out numbers with mounting excitement. When it was all done, Angela had won $6000 Canadian. She and Bella jumped up and down, and Edward clapped Ben on the back.

Edward told Ang and Ben where to cash in her winnings, and to take the payout without playing any more games. He said that it was rare for anyone to ever win more than one game against the house, and not to get carried away. Angela said a little prayer of thanks under her breath and she and Ben went to get in line for the cashier.

I turned to Edward. "So what is she going to do with the money?"

Edward tuned in on Ang's thoughts, and murmured, "She's going to put some of it toward tuition, and share some of it with Ben, and she's going to tithe part of it to the church, and buy Ben a set of classic martial arts movies he's been wanting, and she's going to buy her parents and her brothers tickets to a Mariner's game , and a new outfit for herself. I really do like that girl, Bella. I'm glad you have a friend like her."

The three of us wandered through the Casino, mostly watching people in our group play. Nobody else won or lost anything major, but everyone had a lot of fun.

Right on schedule, we piled back into our vehicles and got in line to cross the border. Soon, we were speeding towards home.

Hours passed, and sometimes the Vanquish was ahead of the minibus, and sometimes Rosalie got ahead of us. It took longer for them to stop for meals, because we only had to feed Bella and they had to feed 8 people and pretend to eat too.

At suppertime, we all pulled into a McDonalds. The human girls came and joined us after using the facilities. Edward and Bella were sitting next to each other on the long bench side of our group of tables. Lauren was the first to slide down the opposite end of the bench, so she sat next to Edward. Edward was in the middle of a conversation with the boys. He glanced at Lauren, and then refocused on Mike, who was telling a funny story about his parents. Edward stiffened. He gave Lauren a frosty look, picked Bella up, scooted over, set her down where he had been sitting, and sat in her place. He set her tray gently back in front of her and kissed her on the side of her head.

Bella looked at Edward, puzzled. She shrugged dismissively, and went back to eating her burger. Suddenly, Bella stiffened and gave Lauren a frosty look. Bella asked Edward to get her a takeout bag, which he did. Then, she asked to get going, and the four of us marched out to the Vanquish.

"Okay, what was that all about?" Jasper demanded as I stood laughing.

Edward looked embarrassed and indignant. "I can't believe what a sl-(_ahem_) that girl is. She knows I'm getting married in 18 days, and she knows Bella and I are _happy,_ and she still put her hand on my knee. And her thoughts are _filthy_. She was thinking about involving me in a group." Jazz and I roared with laughter.

Bella cleared her throat, "Edward? She put her hand on my knee, too."

"Oh, no way! That is too much. You just _had_ to bring her, Alice! Her presence created a big problem that I'm feeling a little guilty about. I don't know how to sort it out."

Bella gave Edward a funny look, "What problem would that be?"

"Well, we brought that floozy, and she acted true to form, and consequently I feel a little responsible for the harm she could do the victims, even if they _are_ mostly people I don't really like. She has a disease. And she has cooties."

"Cooties, Edward? You mean head lice? That's solvable."

"I never said they were on her head, Bella. She has crabs."

Bella pitched over sideways. "What disease?" she snorted.

"From her thoughts post-ladies room, she's just had her first outbreak of herpes. I can't even rat on her to any of her conquests because she hasn't even been to the doctor yet. There's no way anybody could know."

I suddenly zoned out and when I came to, Jazz was supporting me as usual. "You don't need to worry, Edward. I just Saw her sitting in a clinic with most of the guys from our class. They all look very awkward."

"_Most_ of our _class_? Just how many guys has she been with?" Bella gawked.

"Bella, _Lauren_ makes my cousin _Tanya _look chaste. I know Jazz and I escaped, but I doubt she missed anybody else. Except maybe a couple of the gay ones."

"A couple? What about the rest?"

"She convinced them to experiment. See why I try not to listen to people's thoughts? Lauren's highly dangerous. I haven't figured out a redeeming quality in her, and I don't _ever again_ want to be close enough to her to try and identify one. Let's hope nobody ever makes her a vampire, because I don't want to know how her talent would manifest."

"I don't get why any guy would go for her, do you?"

"Some humans are like sheep, Bella. They follow the herd without thinking for themselves. All it takes is a dare or a little flattery and they jump on what ever wagon drives by."

"Well," I said, "At least she only got her claws into two of the human males we took with us."

"Ha, ha, that's what you think, Ms. Gypsy. You don't read minds. She had _all_ the human males in our group except Ben. He turned her down. And I imagine she'll have made a play for all the Cullens before we reach Forks, too."

The three of us chorused "Ew" as we piled in the car and took off. Ten minutes later, Bella piped up,"I hope Lauren asks Rosalie for a threesome. And I really hope I'm there to watch the fallout." We laughed, imagining...

After sunset, Edward and Jasper took off into the woods to hunt, and I babysat Bella, who was happy to get an earful about the other people on the trip and what the future might hold for them. The boys returned in less than an hour, having found themselves a herd of deer within a short distance, their eyes warm and golden. The mood mellowed. Jazz got in the driver's seat and I moved up to sit with him so that Edward and Bella could have the back for awhile. Edward retrieved a blanket from the trunk, and he and Bella curled up on the back seat. He hummed softly to her. Within a short time, she was sound asleep.

Jazz drove through the night, and before long the minibus was visible in front of us. It pulled off after about 100 miles, into another rest stop. Emmett waved as we passed by, and yawned and stretched theatrically. Jazz kept driving.

Through the day, we travelled in stops and starts, listening to Edward's CDs. The minibus was somewhere behind us. Toward evening, Edward called Rose and suggested that we should stop so that everyone could stretch their legs. We pulled over in a park that had fire pits with cooking grates, and we got out and started a small fire in one.

Edward got the blanket, and Jasper got the guitar, and by the time we were comfortable, Rose and Emmett had pulled in with the eight teenagers. She and Emmett shepherded the kids off the bus, and they gladly trouped over to warm themselves by the little fire. I pulled out the snacks that I had foreseen we would need, and passed them around. We sang a couple of old camp songs, and Jasper played a couple of Spanish guitar songs. Everyone clapped and murmured appreciatively. Then, Edward was asked if he would sing something again.

"Well, what do you want me to sing?" he asked quietly, a little bemused. He was glancing around, so I bet a lot of people had ideas.

"Do you know _Adored_ by Collective Soul?" Jessica asked. Yes, I Saw.

Edward nodded briefly and took the guitar from Jasper. Bella was surprised. "You never told me you could play guitar, Edward."

"Well, I don't play it half as well as Jazz. Piano is my instrument." Edward strummed the strings tentatively, and launched into the song. The humans sat quietly, and Emmett, Rose, and I joined in on the chorus. The humans joined in, too. Edward glanced at Tyler and followed up with another Collective Soul song, _She Gathers Rain_. Tyler looked pleased. The humans were beginning to mellow out.

Edward passed the guitar off to Emmett and went to sit with Bella. Emmett said the crowd was too sleepy for his kind of music, and passed the guitar back to Jazz. Jazz crooned _Annie's Song_ by John Denver, and _Rainbow Connection_. The group was, truly, getting sleepy under the hypnotic voices of the Cullen boys. Rosalie called an end to the evening, and the kids piled back into the minibus and settled down for the night.

Jazz got behind the wheel again. We followed the minibus through the darkness. It was dull until Bella suddenly exclaimed in her sleep, "Alice! We are _not _having the wedding at a nudist camp! Charlie would flip. And _I _do not want to see anybody's doodahs. Well, except Edward's. No, _not_ in public! Put the camera away and don't ever ask me again. _How_ you could imagine that we would agree to that sort of thing is beyond me."

The vampires' snickering lasted a long time. Maybe I _should_ suggest those things to Bella, just to freak her out. I Saw her reaction. Oh, yeah, I would have to do it in front of witnesses. Lots of them. Priceless. We were going to get a lot of mileage out of this one.

Bella went back to silent slumber, and Edward smirked silently out the window, doubtless imagining Charlie, Renee and Phil at a nudist wedding. By breakfast, we had hit the first stretch of the I-90 that would take us home. Jasper pulled into a truck stop and Edward took Bella in to get cleaned up and have breakfast. Rose and Em's group were already inside. Everybody looked a little worse for wear.

Edward took the next stretch of road. The rest of the day passed monotonously. We made intermittent stops and both vehicles changed drivers for show. By 8pm, the humans were all snoring. Extensive travel certainly wore them out quickly. We would have to keep that in mind from now on.

Edward surrendered the wheel to me in the middle of the night, the better to hear Bella sleep-talking. I think he wanted to sit where he could wake her if she said anything too incriminating, but sadly, she seemed fixated on making apologies to dream people for the engagement photo. I guess it was still worrying her. Edward sighed. He sounded a little miffed.

At 6 am, Edward pulled out his cell phone and called Carlisle. He told him that we should be home by approximately 8 am, and to please ask Esme to prepare breakfast for the humans.

Shortly after 8:00, we pulled into our private drive, the minibus behind us. A group of families was standing on the lawn, waiting to receive their kids. Everyone in our group was surprised except me. Esme had a long line of tables set up with pancakes, fruit, drinks and warm ham. She was fluttering around, delighted with the opportunity to play hostess.

Bella was peeking warily at the crowd, probably wondering where to find Charlie. She muttered something under her breath to Edward that sounded like, "There had _better_ not be any sausage on that table. I have had enough sausage jokes from your siblings for a lifetime."

I parked the Vanquish and the four of us piled out. Suddenly, there was Charlie, looking a little sheepish and very happy to see Bella. He stuck one arm out to hug her, and then reached out to pull Edward to his other side. I knew everything would work out. I always knew.


	6. Chapter 6

**Minibusted**

**Everything belongs to Stephenie Meyer. **

**Written because Edward can't be humiliated _all _the time, even tho' that is fun. He has to have a chance at some happiness.**

**Chapter 6: Confronting the Scandal**

**Charlie's pov**

Carlisle and Esme greeted me warmly when I stepped out of the cruiser. A bunch of parents were milling about the place, waiting for their kids just like I was. _They_ hailed me warmly too, although a couple of the men gave me a ribbing about the scandalous newspaper picture of my daughter and her fiance. Alice hadn't meant any harm by it, I was sure, but I had warned her to be more careful of other people's reputations in the future. She was a good girl, but a bit naive about consequences, and had been suitably chagrined when I was stern with her.

To think that Edward and Bella were so upset that they took off across the entire continent! Such a long way to drive. Only the young would go so far for such a short time.

Edward was so embarrassed when he called me from Seattle to explain why they wanted to get out of Dodge. Thank goodness Edward was a good kid. He called me every day they were away to make sure I knew how, and what, they were doing.

I still couldn't believe it that Carlisle had decided to send all the kids' friends along on the trip, so that gossip would hopefully be kept down to a dull roar. There was no disputing it, Bella was marrying into a good family.

I fidgeted a little while I waited for my daughter and almost-son. I wasn't forgetting the resentful look on Bella's face when I walked into Esme's kitchen to liberate Edward from my handcuffs. I hoped she'd forgiven me. I hoped that I had grown up a little in the last week. She probably had.

Finally, all the teenagers arrived and rushed to greet their families. And there was my girl, walking toward me with her future husband at her side. They looked relaxed and happy. I had never really seen them appear relaxed. They were smiling and waving at everyone like they had no cares in the world, but they were heading to speak to _me _first.

Bella walked into my hug, grinning widely and asking if anybody had fed me while she was away. I laughed. Everything was going to be fine.

"Actually, I think everybody was afraid I was going to starve, so I was pretty much spoiled the whole time you were gone. Esme had Emmett, Rose and Alice drop off lunches to me every day, and Esme and Carlisle had me over to dinner a couple of times, and Billy had me and the Clearwaters over twice for the evening and fed me, too.

I pulled Edward into a hug on my other side, and thanked him for taking care of my girl. Then I stood proudly with my arms around both of them. Edward chuckled.

"It suddenly occurs to me, that this is the first time I've taken Bella anywhere significant that she has come home _on time _and _uninjured_," he teased, "It must be due to your approval." His odd golden eyes sparkled. Bella poked him in the side, and he laughed freely. I rolled my eyes.

Esme was running around with a camera, taking pictures of everybody. She stopped in front of us and told us to smile. I did my best to make it a good picture, even though I disliked having my photo taken. It was an important moment that I wanted to preserve. The moment my _family _came home to me.

I looked at the pair of them surreptitiously. They were scruffy, not particularly clean and they looked a little travel-worn, but they looked good. I didn't want to think about what they might have been up to in their hotel, but I had to admit that they looked complete together and I knew that their life together would be good. They were both more mature than Renee and I had been at their age.

The group of parents was coming over now, expecting to greet my kids. Several minutes were taken up while the Stanleys, the Webers, the Martins, the Crowleys, and the Newtons shook hands and expressed their thanks for including their kids on the trip. The Marks, the Mallory's and the Cheneys were absent. Then, there was a surprise from the group of parents. A surprise that was not exactly ... welcome.

Every one of those families pulled out a copy of the offending newspaper. _Every one _of them held up the Engagement Announcement, and in stereo, the adults asked for Edward and Bella's autographs. Both of them averted their faces and just about collapsed on the spot. Then, they chuckled with good grace, and Edward asked for a pen. The crowd broke out in a round of enthusiastic applause. The kids stood there and signed every copy, giggling the whole time. I noticed they used their signatures to cover up as much of the photos as they could.

Suddenly, Edward froze and looked up. Beats me what tipped him off. "_Banzai!_" Mike Newton bellowed, and then, with a great warlike roar, all the young people converged on Bella and Edward. They pelted something at the kids. Edward threw out his hands and ducked,and Bella tried to hide behind his back, but they were both getting hit anyway. Mike ran up to Edward and stuffed something down his shirt. Jessica Stanley did the same to Bella. Condoms, colorful ones, were raining down around the highly embarrassed young couple like confetti. A scuffle ensued, where my kids tried to give the prophylactics back, and the friends tried to force them to accept them.

"Come on now, you two, be responsible. We don't want any surprises, do we?" Mike taunted, retreating. Edward lobbed a handful of condoms at Mike, who turned just in time for them to bounce off the back of his head. Fancy that! Edward Cullen had a sense of humor. He chased after Mike, joshing, and whipped foil packets at him, while blushing Bella tussled with Jess and tried to shove condoms down Jess's shirt. The parents and the Cullen siblings hooted and hollered, egging them on.

Edward's brothers blew up condoms like balloons and held them out lewdly, taunting the kids, who added their names to the list of baddies to pursue. Alice's camera clicked furiously. What a brat that girl was. Good thing she was cute. You just couldn't stay mad at her. Maybe it's because you could see how much she loved everybody.

Esme came intervened. She shooed everybody away from our kids and toward the tables, scolding the guests both for inciting riot and for letting the food get cold. Esme put her hand on her youngest boy's cheek and smiled up at him. He lowered his eyes bashfully. Then Esme kissed Bella. Carlisle came over and embraced his son and kissed my daughter. After a moment, Edward's parents pulled us over to the food, to join the amused group socializing on the lawn. It promised more happy times.


	7. Chapter 7

**Minibusted**

**It all belongs to Stephenie Meyer. Please don't sue me.**

**Because I love a fluffy ending.**

**Epilogue: Saying Goodbye to the Group**

**Bella's pov**

"I don't suppose Charlie will let me sleep over at your house tonight," I looked up from under my lashes at my personal angel.

"I wouldn't push it, love. Life is good. Let's keep Charlie calm for five minutes. I can always kidnap you in a day or two." Edward smiled his crooked smile.

"I'll take that as a promise." We walked hand-in-hand to the edge of the lawn, where friends and acquaintances and ... others were chatting under the trees. Lauren was the first to approach, to thank Edward for counting her in on the trip even though she had not exactly been kind to me in the past. Lauren hoped we would consider her a _friend _in the future. Right. We both knew how she treated her friends. Edward nodded coolly, and wished her luck.

Actually, Lauren might have trouble finding friends in the future. Everybody in our group was giving her a wide berth already. Obviously, word of her antics had gotten around. Even Jess was avoiding her. What would happen when it went through the grapevine that she had an STD? She might have to leave Forks. What a shame.

At least all the boys had some small degree of protection now. Edward had collected up and divided out the condoms. Each boy had a good couple of boxes worth in his pocket. Edward told them that we couldn't possibly go through that many before they expired. Edward warned the boys not to leave them in a wallet or pocket to get overheated and damaged. The boys were now swaggering around, teasing each other about their studliness. Thank goodness Edward wasn't like them.

"I wonder if Lauren is going to rat on us to the grapevine," I mused.

"Are you kidding? With all the dirt you have on her? She is scared to death that _you_ will rat _her_ out. Guard yourself, or she is going to become your new best friend, just so she can keep tabs on you."

"Oh, crap. Anything but that." Maybe I should get 'call block' service on the phone.

Edward and I divided up to say goodbye to our guests. Jess pulled me aside, "You know, Bella, I used to think the Cullens were terrible snobs, and I was a little scared of Emmett, but I was dumb. They are really wonderful people and I had so much fun with them on the trip. I had no idea Edward was so _funny_. He seems so serious most of the time. Thanks for having me along."

"You're welcome, Jess. I'm glad you were able to come. It was a blast, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, something we will all remember when we're old and grey."

"Sure, sure."

Edward was busy saying goodbye to Mike, Conner, Austin and Tyler, who were leaving at the same time. After they mock punched him, they came over to me and each of them lined up and quickly kissed me on the cheek.

"Aw, get outta here and stop coming on to my girl! Go get your own!" Edward shook a fist at them as they hurried off laughing. Then they waved, and were gone. Edward smiled after them. "Thank heaven they're going. Not that they're bad people, just immature. All the dirty things in their heads, you would not believe. They were giving me a headache."

"We can't have that," I said, and pulled him down so I could kiss his brow. He rested his forehead against mine. Somebody cleared her throat quietly. I looked up. All the Webers and Ben stood before us.

"Oh, Ang. There's my best girl and bridesmaid! Are you guys heading out, too?" I smiled as Edward ruffled the twins' hair.

"Yeah, I'm ready for a nap, and then there's a bit of shopping I want to do."

"I'm so glad that things went _so _well for you on the trip." I didn't want to mention the gambling win, when she might not have told her parents about it yet.

"Thanks, Bella. Edward? That's the best trip I've ever been on, and I'm so glad that Ben and I got to spend so much time with you both."

**Edward's pov:**

"Well, that feeling is mutual. I've _always_ been happy that Bella found such a good friend in you, and that you and Ben have included me in your circle. You both mean a lot to us."

"Thanks, Edward. You both mean a lot to us, too. I know we'll see you a lot this summer, but you will keep in touch when you're away at Dartmouth, right?" Her smile faltered.

"We'll do our best."

"Okay. Love you guys." _Why do I feel like I'm going to lose them? It's insecure. They won't forget me. They are our best friends._

"Love you, too." I said sincerely. I hoped Bella could remain friends with them after the change. At least a long distance friendship should be okay.

Ang gave me a loose hug and then gave Bella a tight squeeze. Ben gripped my hand in farewell.

Ang stepped back to look at Bella. "I'll probably talk to you in a couple of days, okay Bella? I'll try to keep you sane despite Alice.... I suppose she'll have more wedding hoops to make us jump through." Ang rolled her eyes.

"Probably. Your help sounds great... but Ang? _No_ more sexy movies for us for at least a few weeks, okay?" Bella scowled.

"You got it girlfriend."

**The End.**


End file.
